femmesabaru-New-York-Times

Untuk post kali ini akan gw tulis dalam bahasa Indonesia (karena otak lagi lebih produktif dalam bahasa Indonesia -- alasan macam apa ini? Hahaha). Tapi seperti biasa, pasti ada sisipan-sisipan bahasa Inggrisnya, jadi mohon dimaklumi.

Jadi.... yang mau gw ceritain kali ini adalah pemikiran yang terpicu oleh saat dimana salah satu relatives gw meng-add gw di Blackberry Messenger (maap ya eike masih pake BBM). Dan seperti biasa selalu diawali dengan basa-basi. She asked how I'm doing, whether I still remember who she is or not, bla bla bla, dan sampai akhirnya keluarlah statement ini... "ade udah gede ya. Pasti sekarang udah punya pacar..."

BAM!

"...udah gede ya. Pasti sekarang udah punya pacar..."

Somehow, kalimat itu tuh meng-imply, kalo udah gede, kita harus punya pacar (well that's how I perceived it, but I may be wrong too).  Dan pada saat itu juga, I went to antara kasian dan kesal karena ternyata masih ada orang yang berpola pikir seperti itu. Pola pikir seperti apa? Seakan-akan tujuan kita menjadi lebih tua (atau mungkin mereka pikir lebih dewasa) adalah hanya untuk mencari pasangan. Gw ga mau munafik by saying I don't want a boyfriend. I do. Tapi I know, at this age, hal itu bukanlah prioritas utama gw (dan pada saat yang bersamaan itu mungkin menjadi prioritas utama orang lain). Masih ada lebih banyak hal yang menjadi prioritas yang lebih utama di bandingkan hanya mencari pacar. Keluarga, studi, karir, semua itu harusnya datang sebelum pasangan.

I know I've talked about this a million times, tapi itu karena gw mau meyakinkan kalian semua yang membaca ini that it is perfectly okay to be single! Ga ada yang perlu kalian takutin & raguin hanya karena kalian single. Bahkan harusnya kalian berbahagia karena kalian masih diberikan waktu yang jauh lebih banyak untuk kalian membuat karya.

Jadi, pacaran prioritas keberapa Fem? Honestly, I don't know exactly where it is on my priority list right now. Tapi yang pasti, hal itu bukanlah fokus gw saat ini.

When I say ... "I am a Christian" 
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin'." 
I'm whispering "I was lost, 
Now I'm found and forgiven." 

When I say ... "I am a Christian" 
I don't speak of this with pride. 
I'm confessing that I stumble 
and need Christ to be my guide. 

When I say ... "I am a Christian" 
I'm not trying to be strong. 
I'm professing that I'm weak 
And need His strength to carry on. 

When I say ... "I am a Christian" 
I'm not bragging of success. 
I'm admitting I have failed 
And need God to clean my mess. 

When I say ... "I am a Christian" 
I'm not claiming to be perfect, 
My flaws are far too visible 
But, God believes I am worth it. 

When I say ... "I am a Christian" 
I still feel the sting of pain. 
I have my share of heartaches 
So I call upon His name. 

When I say ... "I am a Christian" 
I'm not holier than thou, 
I'm just a simple sinner 
Who received God's good grace, somehow.

- Maya Angelou

Family:

Ok, untuk kali gw bakal post dalam bahasa pertama gw, karena gw lagi males untuk translate ke Inggris (tapi yakin banget sih pasti bakal tetep ada sedikit kalimat-kalimat dalam bahasa Inggris). Anyways, jadi yang mau gw bahas hari ini apa sih? Well ini adalah suatu hal yang tiba-tiba muncul di pikiran gw.

Pernah ga sih kalian tuh bingung banget tentang suatu pilihan? Pernah ga kalian ada di situasi dimana lo lagi punya mimpi besar, cuman kayaknya lo ga bisa atau ga punya resources untuk mencapai mimpi kalian itu?  Gw sering banget. Waktu gw mau masuk kuliah, tentu aja gw pengen masuk uni ini uni itu, cuman emang keadaan finansial waktu itu ga memungkinkan buat gw masuk ke uni yang keren banget (karena yang keren itu biasanya mahal). Dan jangan salah artiin keren, keren disini maksud gw itu adalah keren dimana kampusnya menyediakan kurikulum yang bertaraf internasional, yang image nya udah cukup diketahui dan emang istilahnya jebolan uni itu tuh pasti bakal dapat kerja deh. So there I am, with my dreams, pengen masuk disana sini, dengan satu uni yang jadi target utama gw.

Terus udah di keadaan dengan banyaknya pilihan, kita seringkali jadi bingung, mau ngikutin kemauan utama kita ato serahin ke Tuhan. Seringkali sih kita bilang, terserah Tuhan deh mau bawa kemana,  tapi sadar ga sadar, dibalik perkataan itu sebenarnya ada sebuah pesan dimana kita sebenarnya mau bilang gini, Tuhan gw mau kesini nih, tolong buat jadi nyata yah. PADAHAL, tujuan atau target utama kita itu BUKAN rencana Tuhan.

Kenapa? Karena kita keseringan ngelihat dengan kacamata manusia. Maksudnya apa? Maksudnya adalah kita terlalu sering melihat dengan cara pandang manusia, kita melihat penilaian manusia. Karena dunia ini mengatakan A itu yang terbaik, jadi kita juga mau dapetin A. But it doesn't work that way with God.

Tuhan punya rencana yang jauh lebih indah dibandingkan dengan rencana manusia! Apa yang menurut manusia terbaik, belum tentu yang terbaik untuk kita menurut Tuhan. Emang yang bakal kita dapetin itu bisa dinilai manusia sebagai hal yang biasa-biasa aja, nilainya masih ga bagus-bagus banget. Tapi rencana Tuhan ga berhenti disitu. Hidup kita udah dirancang sedemikian rupa oleh Tuhan, bahkan sampai nafas terakhir kita udah Tuhan rancang. Dan gw yakin banget, segala sesuatu pasti dimulai dari hal yang kecil, hal yang sederhana, hal yang dinilai manusia sebagai sesuatu yang sama sekali ga wah, tapi dibelakang itu semua, ada rancangan yang lebih mulia.

Terus gimana dong? Kalo emang kayak gitu, apa yang seharusnya gw lakuin? My answer would be, fast, pray and ask Him! Dan sebenarnya ini adalah point terpenting. Kenapa? Kadang kita cuma bilang aja, terserah Tuhan mau dibawa kemana, tapi kita ga pernah actually berdoa dan nanya ke Tuhan, Dia maunya bawa kita kemana. Bener ga? Kita cuma bilang doang di mulut kita terserah Tuhan, tapi kita ga pernah bener-bener berdoa dan nanya ke Tuhan! Dan kenapa puasa? kata om Ronny D. Simeon, puasa adalah saat dimana kita menempatkan diri kita pada frekuensi yang sama dengan Tuhan supaya kita bisa mendengar apa kata Tuhan.

Kita ini bukan tuhan, jadi kita ga bakal bisa tahu apa mau Tuhan kalo kita ga tanya sama Dia! Tanya deh, pasti dijawab, ga mungkin engga. Jalan Tuhan itu ga ada yang tahu arahnya kemana, terus lewat mana. Rencana Tuhan itu kayak sebuah petualangan menjelajahi hal baru. Jadi daripada kita ngerasain apa yang udah orang lain rasain, kenapa ga kita ikutin apa kata Tuhan, dan ngerasain hal-hal yang belum pernah orang lain rasain sebelumnya.

Jadi, gw ga boleh bermimpi gitu? No. Feel free to have big dreams! Tapi inget, jangan paksa Tuhan untuk me-realize mimpi kita, yang ternyata bukan rencanaNya. Just tell Him what we want. Dan ingat, selalu bersyukur dengan apapun yang Ia berikan. Apa yang dinilai manusia ga berharga, bisa jadi adalah suatu hal yang sangat berharga bagi Tuhan.

happy sunday all.
love, femme.

Perintah berkerajaan muncul setelah pemberkatan nikah Adam dan Hawa. Everybody in this world was born to fulfill an assignment.

No matter how many times you've been stabbed, beaten, hurt... You are the one who determines you're next step, to keep going and trying, or to stay where you are and suffer.

10 years from now huh? That means I'll be at the age of 30... I wish to be:

1. Graduated from both my Bachelor's Degree and my Master's Degree - well I counted that by the age of 22 I'll be graduating from my Bachelor's Degree. And then I'm gonna go straight off to take my Master's Degree in Australia, Switzerland or Canada.

2. Working in IT-IS-Biz Consulting Firm, outside of Indonesia of course - right now I'm planning to settle my life after the whole tertiary education in Australia. But then I'm also interested in living Europe.. Sooooo, I don't know. I may have plans now, but I'll let God take me wherever He wants me to be at.

3. Married! - Yea, I'm planning to marry at the age of 25. Hahaha.. But we'll see about this one. Hopefully I can meet with the right guy at the right timing :D

photo courtesy of Chrisya KF

Last Saturday, we finally held the BINUS Jazz 2013 event. And I must say I am a happy and a proud Project Manager. I felt like my hard work finally paid off. The event was a big success (well that's how I see it and according to what some people say :p) There were around 400 people coming to the event and the vibe was real good!

However, I know that this all won't be a success without the help of these people:

1. God - of course God would be the first one I thank, for bringing me this far, for not letting breakdown and always giving me strength when I'm about to loose it

2. Daddy - although you're no longer there to see me prepare and held this event, I know that you're looking at me from heaven. And I know that you're happy that I have made this achievement

3. Mommy - for always reminding me of my health, I needed that

4. Sissy - For always being there when I needed a getaway

5. My fellow Executive Committee and Coordinators, Echa, Della, Fallen, Eka, Feby, Hilda, Ka Vanda, Wina, Rhesa - You guys are definitely the best support I can ever have

BINUS Jazz 2013 Committee

6. My advisors - You guys definitely helped me made decisions and guided me through out the preparation

7. The whole committee - Although some of you guys gave me headaches but you guys were awesome

And all the others whom I can't mention one by one here. Thank you all so much!

(left to right) Dennis Junio, someone, Echa Soemantri, Cahyo, Matthew Sayersz, Me, someone, Dani, Eka, someone

xoxo,

Femme

So... from late February until early April I went through this candidate selection for a competition in Singapore this May. At first I wasn't really sure about it, whether I'm capable and actually a perfect fit (or at least suited) candidate to represent my university, but then I thought rather than regretting seeing someone else go might as well just give my best to it.

From individual selection until group selection I managed to pass all of it. And finally it came down to the very last selection... At that moment I realized that I wanted to be a part of the competition and as a representative for my uni real bad, so I tried giving the best I could (although I know I'm not yet like the senior ones). Then it came down to the part where we had to wait for the announcement. Definitely jitters! But at the same time the desire to be a part of it becomes stronger. At that time all I could do was pray that I can pass the last round of selection.

Well I guess my prayer was heard by God and...

A few days ago, one of my friend asked me a question. The question was that, "do you still think about your dad?" And my answer was, "yea, definitely. Almost all the time. Why?"

Now here's the kinda-shocking-but-actually-not-really statement that my friend said, "you don't seem like someone who've lost their father."

I don't know for sure what my friend has in mind, but what I'm assuming is that my friend sees the joyful and super-happy faces of mine almost everyday, and so my friend thinks that I'm not thinking about my dad.

Well actually. I do think about my dad a lot, I remember the days where I used to hug his big belly, how I used to sleep next to him and listening the beat of his heart, how I hold his hand while he drives, I remember it all. And now that he's no longer here on earth, I do feel that I'm missing him.

Loosing him may have changed my life, but one thing for sure is that, him leaving doesn't mean that I have to let go of my joy. Infact, why should I? I know that he's in a better place now, I know that he's with God, so why should I be sad right?

All I wanna point out here is that, just because I can still smile and laugh, that doesn't mean I've forgotten about my dad. No. I just know that he's in a better place, that's why I smile.

And dad, I do miss you, and I will always miss you.

-your one and only bonjer

A small message I want to pass on to you guys. If you seriously can't stand the anger, at least try not to express it in social media networks. The impact of it can be very serious.

I have been single for years. And I realized that being single wasn't so bad after all. I also learn a lot from being single. Many people think the adolescent years, or during your teenage years, you should be having fun, having boyfriends or girlfriends, hang out with your friends, and things like that. And when you have done that, that's when they say that you are enjoying life. But I personally think that that is a very narrow way to think of how you should live your life.

I often hear girls complain whenever they are in the single status, because they think when they're single their popularity degrades, they are no longer the "it" girls, or in Indonesia they would say, "Lo ga gaul!" Well, after being single for years (in my teenage years) I realize that this is a totally wrong perception or mindset. There is nothing wrong with being single. Yes you might feel lonely at sometime, you might be jealous of your friends who have those special person who supports in them in what they do, but don't we remember that even before we met our boyfriends and girlfriends, even before we met our friends, our family is already there first for us. They're the ones who always stand up for us, through the goods and the bad. This is actually why I enjoy being a single girl up until now (and still committing to be one until I graduate from my bachelor's degree).

But the question that pops in your mind would probably be, why remain single when can be in a  relationship? That's a nice questions! Well let me tell you why

1. You have more time to spend with your family -The best thing that you can spend on your family is TIME. My own principle of life is that spend as much as time with your family, because you don't when you're going to be separated from them. I have been living with this principle even before my dad passed away, which is why I'm more of a home-person or family-oriented person.

2. You can try new things - Maybe some of you who are reading this second reason is thinking, "well we can try new things with our boyfriend/girlfriend," but the question I want to ask you back is that, is your boyfriend/girlfriend seriously willing to try those new things with you? What if they hate that new thing you want to try? See, you don't know for sure. And rather than being in uncertainty of whether you're going to be in accordance with your partner, I suggest you try things by yourself. Right?

3. You have more time to do things of your own - During our adolescent years, we need to be able to do a lot of things, and I believe that we can only achieve it if we don't spend too much time being with your boyfriend/girlfriend (especially when you have an overly attached boyfriend/girlfriend, definitely UGH!). For example like me right now, I get to join a lot of organizations and clubs and through that I can experience lots of things that maybe I won't be experiencing if I had a boyfriend. And I do believe it is not a waste of time to actually be a part of all these organizations, since there are so many things that aren't taught theoretically and can only be gained by doing it.

4. You don't want to go through broken-heart moments hundred times - As far as I know, many of the girls who go through break-ups takes quite some time to "recover". But my point is, if you could safe your heart from hundreds of break-ups then why not? Because crying for a guy who will not be our wedded husband is a definite waste of time (but this doesn't apply to our father, because girls, he will always be your number one man! :) ).

Well I hope those reasons above might convince to spending your time to yourself first~ Do leave a comment about what you think personally on being single.

xoxo,
Femme 😘

Isaiah 55:1-3
“Come, everyone who thirsts,
come to the waters;
and he who has no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without price.
Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread,
and your labor for that which does not satisfy?
Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good,
and delight yourselves in rich food.
Incline your ear, and come to me;
hear, that your soul may live;
and I will make with you an everlasting covenant,
my steadfast, sure love for David.
Men are never satisfied.
1 John 3:20
for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything.
God is bigger than anything in this world.
Psalms 119:97
Oh how I love your law!
It is my meditation all the day.
Renungkan firman Tuhan sampai kita mengerti.
Romans 1:16
The Righteous Shall Live by Faith
For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek.
The word of the Lord is our strength. Who can enjoy the goodness of the Lord:
1. People who are hungry and thirsty of the word of the Lord
2. People who can give thanks to the Lord
Orang yang bersungut-sungut tidak bisa melihat masa depan.
3. People who put aside their weight and sins
Ephesians 5:20
giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,
Hebrews 12:1
Chapter 12
Jesus, Founder and Perfecter of Our Faith
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,
Menyesal = membenci diri sendiri dan berbuat lagi
Bertobat = berbalik san meninggalkan. METANOIA

Well hello lovely people. How have you all been doing? I hope you are well. As for me personally, I'm still trying to strengthen myself as a few weeks ago my father passed away, and believe it or not he passed away right on Valentine's Day. It was all a shock for us, for me personally. Because there was no sign of him being very ill or anything, and I remembered just the day before he went away I was still on the phone with him, talking about my exam. But I guess only God's will that can happen in our life. And that it was God's will for my dad to go back to heaven.

taken in Venezia, 2003

From emptiness to fullness!
Ruth 1
Mahlon: sickly
Chilion: weak or consumptive
Elimelech: my God is my King
God's blessing is progressive. Make sure there's King in our life!
Our God is a God of unusual kindness. Sow unusual kindness. Two outcomes of a process; better OR bitter. Which one are you? Our God is a God of fullness. Dalam Tuhan kita harus siap menerima kelimpahan.
1. Be committed! Make decisions!
There's always risk to commitment. Be a (calculated) risk-taker. Committed and decisive.
Eve: life-giver
Ruth 2
2. Be diligent!
Ruth 3
3. Be submitted!
Provision (supply), protection, promotion: qualities of a husband. Good, godly, gentle man.
Ruth 4
4. Be blessed! Blessed to bless

1 Thessalonians 4:13-14
But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep.
1. Eternal Home2 Corinthians 5:11
The Ministry of Reconciliation
Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade others. But what we are is known to God, and I hope it is known also to your conscience.
2 Corinthians 5:10
For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.
2. Reward
Ephesians 6:8
knowing that whatever good anyone does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether he is a bondservant or is free.
1 Corinthians 15:51-52
Behold! I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we shall be changed.
3. Tubuh Kemuliaan

Happy Birthday to my half,
forever my most favorite sister,
whom I love to the bones,Chrisya Keren F Sabaru!
Nothing but the best for you,
for your thesis,
for your studies,
for your career and for everything!

Cause God's goodness and mercy shall follow you all of your days. 

Your one and only,
chubby bubby fatty sister,
F